Post by Tara ntula on Jul 19, 2008 15:28:39 GMT -5
Spoilers and such lie ahead.
I was anxious to check out the ‘little gem of a horror movie’ that is Let’s Scare Jessica to death. Jessica, (Zohra Lampert) our fragile, sweet-natured but cuckoo heroine, has been recently released from an extended stay at a mental institution. Her clueless husband, accompanied by his too-old-to-be-a wandering-hippie friend, whisk her away to their newly purchased, island-dwelling house on the water for some much needed R and R. On the night of their arrival (they travel around in 70’s chic style: a hearse), after a pit stop to do some grave rubbing and such, they find the townspeople to be strange and unreasonably old, the house and surrounding area to be creepy and completely uncharming (fucking lying realtors) and a roaming, unattractive chick named Emily has taken up residence in their castle. It was apparently acceptable in 1971 to welcome with open arms individuals who trespassed onto your digs, rather than be bothered by said breaking and entering. In fact, the thing to do was to ask the creep to stay awhile, which is what this group of gangling retards did. There is never suspicion that this woman might be something other than she says, despite the mounting evidence: 1. She broke into your house 2. Her smiling face is in the antique photo you found in the attic 3. She is fucking your husband (Come on, Jess. If there was ever a time to ditch the bubble gum disposition and dish out a bitch slap, it would be now). Add this to the voices Jessica hears and the undead people that she sees, and we gots us a mystery. Fast forward through a completely lame séance, a couple of dead bodies, a chick running around in a nightgown, some weird encounters with the townsfolk and a floating corpse in the lake and you find yourself at the film’s conclusion.
Good points of the film: The title and the somewhat effective score. Bad points: Everything else. The characters were dull and dumb. The idea appears to be fairly original, but the blatant borrowing from both Rosemary’s Baby and Night of the Living Dead wore on my nerves. The pace teetered on unacceptable the entire film. The director never quite achieved the atmospheric, psychological terrifying feel he was going for. When a film attempts this, there is a risk of creating a snooze fest instead. Which, in my opinion, is essentially what happened here.
I give it a probably too generous 5/10. And a not generous enough 9/10 WTF’s. I would be very interested in hearing a contrasting opinion from someone more intelligent than me. I admit to watching this film when I was in a not-so-good mood and would love to hear about the redeeming qualities that I may've missed.
I was anxious to check out the ‘little gem of a horror movie’ that is Let’s Scare Jessica to death. Jessica, (Zohra Lampert) our fragile, sweet-natured but cuckoo heroine, has been recently released from an extended stay at a mental institution. Her clueless husband, accompanied by his too-old-to-be-a wandering-hippie friend, whisk her away to their newly purchased, island-dwelling house on the water for some much needed R and R. On the night of their arrival (they travel around in 70’s chic style: a hearse), after a pit stop to do some grave rubbing and such, they find the townspeople to be strange and unreasonably old, the house and surrounding area to be creepy and completely uncharming (fucking lying realtors) and a roaming, unattractive chick named Emily has taken up residence in their castle. It was apparently acceptable in 1971 to welcome with open arms individuals who trespassed onto your digs, rather than be bothered by said breaking and entering. In fact, the thing to do was to ask the creep to stay awhile, which is what this group of gangling retards did. There is never suspicion that this woman might be something other than she says, despite the mounting evidence: 1. She broke into your house 2. Her smiling face is in the antique photo you found in the attic 3. She is fucking your husband (Come on, Jess. If there was ever a time to ditch the bubble gum disposition and dish out a bitch slap, it would be now). Add this to the voices Jessica hears and the undead people that she sees, and we gots us a mystery. Fast forward through a completely lame séance, a couple of dead bodies, a chick running around in a nightgown, some weird encounters with the townsfolk and a floating corpse in the lake and you find yourself at the film’s conclusion.
Turns out good ole Emily drowned a few hundred years ago in the lake and has returned, pissed off, that she never got to wear her wedding dress and is now a vampire. (Makes perfect sense, right?) She has spent the past few years biting anyone who stands in her way, and I guess there is supposed to be a hidden meaning in the fact her clientele is all male, including the AARP old dude gang from town. Dear, sweet Jessica discovers Em’s secret, after finding both her cheating hubby and useless friend are bitten, and heads off into town to hopefully catch the next ferry. She ends up trying to row herself off the island, but not before stabbing her hubby a couple times, gently, in the back. (Since when do flesh wounds kill anyone, much less a vampire?) We are left with the visual of Jessica in her boat, defeated but alive, about three feet off the shore, surrounding by Em and her army of freaky old dude vampires. We, the viewers, are left to decide her fate. Was it all in her head? Did she just kill her innocent husband? Or was it real? Does she get away? Personally, I didn’t care enough at that point to draw my own conclusion, so don’t ask me. I was left scratching my head at this one, both do the ambiguous ending and moments of retardation throughout the film.
Good points of the film: The title and the somewhat effective score. Bad points: Everything else. The characters were dull and dumb. The idea appears to be fairly original, but the blatant borrowing from both Rosemary’s Baby and Night of the Living Dead wore on my nerves. The pace teetered on unacceptable the entire film. The director never quite achieved the atmospheric, psychological terrifying feel he was going for. When a film attempts this, there is a risk of creating a snooze fest instead. Which, in my opinion, is essentially what happened here.
I give it a probably too generous 5/10. And a not generous enough 9/10 WTF’s. I would be very interested in hearing a contrasting opinion from someone more intelligent than me. I admit to watching this film when I was in a not-so-good mood and would love to hear about the redeeming qualities that I may've missed.