Post by Matttttttttttt on Jul 23, 2008 18:51:21 GMT -5
For those of you who love anthologies as much as I do, Trapped Ashes is a film with an intriguing concept that sounds promising. "Seven strangers on a Hollywood movie studio tour are trapped inside an infamous House of Horror and forced to tell their most terrifying stories to get out alive." Since this is an anthology, I thought it'd be fitting to look at this segment by segment.
The first tale of the film, "The Girl with Golden Breasts", is fittingly about a woman who gets breast implants. These breast implants, however, feed on blood to keep the woman young, I shit you not. The acting by the lead is just absolutely horrible. It reminded me of Alicia Silverstone in Clueless, except you could tell this woman wasn't acting. Anyway, this is surprisingly the best tale in the film.
That strange fucking tale is followed up with some bullshit Asian tale, "Jibaku". I can't even begin to explain what this is about considering I almost fell asleep watching this snoozefest.
As if that one isn't boring enough, "Stanley's Girlfriend" tells the story of a man who falls in love with his best friend's girl and gets involved in an affair. The only good thing about this one is John Saxon, which I was asking myself how he found his way into this movie at all.
Finally, another crappy segment comes along with the most creative title of all, "My Twin - The Worm". If you couldn't figure it out from the title, this one is about the relationship between a baby in a mother's womb sharing space alongside a tapeworm. In the undying words of Jon Lovitz, "IT STINKS!"
In fact, the wraparound story is probably the most entertaining aspect of the film. Henry Gibson plays the tour guide and gives the only respectable performance in the whole anthology. The stories are waaaaay out there at times, almost as if they were meant to be funny B-movie parodies. The only problem is the laughs are completely unintentional. Still, I was kept mildly entertained by the fact that the stories were kept short.
Rating: 4.5/10, the only reason it gets that high of a score is due to the fact that I am a HARDCORE lover of anthologies. The ending isn't half bad either. If you don't share the same feelings towards the subgenre, you'll definitely hate this movie with a passion.
The first tale of the film, "The Girl with Golden Breasts", is fittingly about a woman who gets breast implants. These breast implants, however, feed on blood to keep the woman young, I shit you not. The acting by the lead is just absolutely horrible. It reminded me of Alicia Silverstone in Clueless, except you could tell this woman wasn't acting. Anyway, this is surprisingly the best tale in the film.
That strange fucking tale is followed up with some bullshit Asian tale, "Jibaku". I can't even begin to explain what this is about considering I almost fell asleep watching this snoozefest.
As if that one isn't boring enough, "Stanley's Girlfriend" tells the story of a man who falls in love with his best friend's girl and gets involved in an affair. The only good thing about this one is John Saxon, which I was asking myself how he found his way into this movie at all.
Finally, another crappy segment comes along with the most creative title of all, "My Twin - The Worm". If you couldn't figure it out from the title, this one is about the relationship between a baby in a mother's womb sharing space alongside a tapeworm. In the undying words of Jon Lovitz, "IT STINKS!"
In fact, the wraparound story is probably the most entertaining aspect of the film. Henry Gibson plays the tour guide and gives the only respectable performance in the whole anthology. The stories are waaaaay out there at times, almost as if they were meant to be funny B-movie parodies. The only problem is the laughs are completely unintentional. Still, I was kept mildly entertained by the fact that the stories were kept short.
Rating: 4.5/10, the only reason it gets that high of a score is due to the fact that I am a HARDCORE lover of anthologies. The ending isn't half bad either. If you don't share the same feelings towards the subgenre, you'll definitely hate this movie with a passion.